Which Honeymoon Destination Is Right for You?

 

A practical guide to choosing based on how you actually want to travel

There is a very specific stage of honeymoon planning when everything starts to go slightly off the rails. You were just going to look at a few ideas.

Then someone sends you a video from Santorini. You save a hotel in Positano. Your fiancé mentions Japan. A coworker comes back from Costa Rica and tells you it was life-changing. Your cousin insists you have to do an all-inclusive because, and I quote, “You will be so tired after the wedding that you won't want to think.”

Now you have 47 saved posts, six browser tabs, three completely different continents and absolutely no idea where you're going. Excellent. This is actually a perfectly reasonable place to start.

The mistake isn't having too many honeymoon ideas. The mistake is assuming you're supposed to choose the destination first. Because the real question isn't "What's the best honeymoon destination?" it's "What's the best honeymoon destination for the two of you?". 

Those are very different questions. And no, the answer isn't automatically Italy. Although Italy would certainly like a word.

First, stop choosing your honeymoon by photograph

This is harder than it sounds. Honeymoon destinations are exceptionally good at marketing themselves. Greece gives us whitewashed buildings tumbling toward impossibly blue water. St. Lucia has those ridiculous Piton views. Italy has apparently arranged for every plate of pasta to be photographed during golden hour. And don't even get me started on the Maldives. 

But a beautiful photograph tells you almost nothing about what it actually feels like to spend a week or two there. So, before we compare destinations, imagine a random day on your honeymoon. Not the day with the private yacht and champagne. Tuesday.

Do you wake up excited because you have somewhere to explore? Or are you hoping there is absolutely nothing on the schedule until dinner?

Would you rather spend the afternoon wandering through a museum and stopping for wine afterward, or snorkeling and then disappearing into a pool chair?

Do you want to unpack once? Do you love trains? Do you hate group tours?

Would one of you happily spend three hours reading every plaque in a historic site while the other starts quietly looking for the nearest café after 17 minutes?

These things matter. A lot. Because you're not choosing the prettiest place. You're choosing where you're going to live for a little while. 

Italy or Greece?

Ah, yes. The heavyweight honeymoon championship. Both are romantic. Both have incredible food. Both are gorgeous. Both will make your friends hate you a little when you post the photos.

But they're not interchangeable.

Italy makes sense if...

You want your honeymoon to involve a lot of doing.

You want to wander through Rome, eat something wonderful in a tiny restaurant, see art you've known about your entire life, take a train somewhere new, drink wine where it was made and somehow stumble across a 600-year-old church while looking for gelato.

Italy rewards curiosity. It also works beautifully for couples who like variety because one trip can combine city, countryside and coast.

The danger? Trying to combine all the cities, countryside and coast. Rome! Florence! Venice! Tuscany! Amalfi! Capri! Lake Como!

Wonderful. You have just planned the honeymoon equivalent of a European business trip. Italy is better when you resist the urge to collect destinations like Pokémon.

Greece makes sense if...

You want the scenery and romance of Europe but picture your honeymoon moving a little more slowly.

Maybe Athens gives you your history fix before you head to an island. Maybe your afternoon plans involve a boat, a long lunch or absolutely nothing besides deciding whether it's too early for another glass of wine.

Greece can be particularly good when one person wants to explore and the other wants a vacation. You can have ruins. You can also have a pool. Diplomacy.

The shorthand

Choose Italy if food, history, cities, wine and exploring are pulling you.

Choose Greece if islands, water, beautiful hotels and a slower rhythm sound closer to your dream.

And if you're saying, “But we want both,” congratulations. You're beginning to understand why I have a job.

Costa Rica or St. Lucia?

These two often end up on the same honeymoon list because they're both lush, tropical and spectacularly beautiful. The actual trips feel very different.

Costa Rica makes sense if...

You think adventure is romantic. You'd happily spend one day hiking near a volcano, another spotting wildlife, another zip-lining or rafting, and then reward yourselves with a beautiful hotel, a spa treatment and drinks somewhere overlooking the rainforest.

Costa Rica is excellent for couples who get twitchy after sitting still for too long. And importantly, “adventure” doesn't have to mean spending your honeymoon damp and covered in mud. There are some spectacular hotels here. You can hike in the morning and have a massage in the afternoon. We're civilized.

St. Lucia makes sense if...

You want the resort itself to be part of the honeymoon. The scenery is dramatic. The hotels can be wildly romantic. And there's something very appealing about waking up, seeing the Pitons and realizing your most pressing responsibility is deciding what to order for breakfast.

You can absolutely explore St. Lucia, sail, hike and get off property. But it lends itself beautifully to couples who want more being and slightly less doing.

The shorthand

Choose Costa Rica if wildlife, adventure and experiences are high on the list.

Choose St. Lucia if romance, scenery and resort time are winning.

Portugal or Southern Italy?

This is one of my favorite comparisons because these destinations can appeal to the same couple for completely different reasons. Both can give you beautiful hotels, historic cities, coastlines, wine, wonderful food and long evenings outside. Your budget may have opinions.

Portugal makes sense if...

You want Europe, but you'd also like your honeymoon budget to survive the experience.

Portugal can deliver an impressive amount of honeymoon for the investment: Lisbon's neighborhoods and restaurants, beautiful boutique hotels, wine country, dramatic coastline and the beaches and cliffs of the Algarve.

It feels romantic without requiring every single day to be a capital-E Event. And because your money may stretch further here than in some of Europe's most famous honeymoon destinations, you might have room for the nicer hotel, private food tour or boat day that actually makes the trip feel special.

Southern Italy makes sense if...

You've been imagining Italy for years. This matters more than people think.

Sometimes there is a destination that is simply part of the dream. If you've pictured yourselves on the Amalfi Coast, eating in Naples, wandering through Puglia or looking across the Bay of Naples from a terrace with a spritz in your hand, substituting another country because it costs less may not scratch the same itch.

Southern Italy can be extraordinary. It can also become expensive quickly—particularly when we start adding the hotels everyone saved on Instagram, private transfers, boats and peak-season travel.

That's not an argument against going. It's an argument for deciding where the splurge matters most.

The shorthand

Choose Portugal if you want European romance with more room in the budget for experiences and upgrades.

Choose Southern Italy if Italy itself is part of what you've been dreaming about.

Japan or Europe?

Sometimes the honeymoon debate isn't between two destinations. It's between two entirely different versions of yourselves. One of you is imagining cafés in Paris. The other has already researched Tokyo ramen. Welcome.

Japan makes sense if...

You want the honeymoon to feel like a genuine adventure.

Japan is incredible for couples who are energized by discovering things together: food, neighborhoods, traditions, trains, temples, technology, history and the tiny everyday differences that make you look at each other and say, “Okay, this is so cool.”

It's romantic in a very different way from the classic European honeymoon. Less “terrace overlooking the Mediterranean.” More “remember that tiny place we found in Kyoto?” For some couples, that's exactly the point.

Europe makes sense if...

Your idea of romance involves beautiful old cities, long meals, architecture, wine, history and wandering around without being entirely sure where you're going. Europe also gives us enormous flexibility.

“Europe” could mean ten days eating through Italy. Portugal and the coast. Paris and the South of France. London followed by Scotland. Germany and Austria. A WWII history trip through several countries.

That's why “we want to go to Europe” is usually the beginning of the conversation, not the end of it.

The shorthand

Choose Japan if you want discovery, contrast and something that feels completely different.

Choose Europe if you're drawn toward classic romance, history, food and the possibility of combining experiences.

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All-inclusive Mexico or a European honeymoon?

This one deserves much more respect than it gets.

Because after months of choosing linens, flowers, invitations, playlists, menus, seating charts and whether Aunt Linda can reasonably sit next to Uncle Steve after what happened at Thanksgiving, there is something deeply luxurious about arriving somewhere and having very few decisions left to make.

An all-inclusive makes sense if...

You are tired. I mean that affectionately. You want a beautiful room. A pool. Great food. Drinks. Maybe a spa. Maybe a cenote or sailing day. Maybe you will leave the resort three times.

Maybe you will leave it zero times. No judgment. A well-chosen all-inclusive honeymoon isn't the “easy option.” For the right couple, ease is the luxury.

Europe makes sense if...

The trip itself is part of the adventure. You don't mind navigating trains, choosing restaurants, changing hotels once or twice and having some structure to your days because exploring together is part of what you're excited about.

Europe asks a little more of you. It can also give you the kind of trip where every day feels different.

The shorthand

Choose an all-inclusive if your dream honeymoon sounds like exhaling.

Choose Europe if it sounds like exploring.

And if you want both? That's why combinations exist. A few days exploring followed by several days doing absolutely nothing is a perfectly respectable honeymoon strategy. Possibly an elite one. 

Okay, but where should we go?

Let's make this easier. Don't pick a country yet - pick yourselves.

“We want to eat everything.”

Start looking at Italy, Portugal, France or Japan.

Build the trip around neighborhoods, markets, restaurants, wine regions, cooking experiences and the sacred honeymoon tradition of ordering dessert even though you're full.

“Please put us somewhere beautiful and bring drinks.”

Look at St. Lucia, Riviera Maya, French Polynesia or the Maldives.

The hotel matters here. A lot. Spend your energy choosing the right property rather than stuffing the itinerary with activities because you feel guilty about “not seeing enough.”

You are on your honeymoon. You may sit down.

“We cannot sit still for seven days.”

Hello, Costa Rica, Japan and South Africa.

Look for places where the days can feel different without requiring you to change hotels every 36 hours. Adventure does not require logistical suffering.

“Give us history, wine and wandering.”

I'd start with Italy, France or Portugal.

This is a fantastic honeymoon style because you don't necessarily need a heavily scheduled itinerary. One meaningful experience each day plus time to wander can be plenty.

“We want to go somewhere we may never go again.”

Now we're talking about Japan, safari, French Polynesia or another destination that's been sitting on your someday list forever. A honeymoon can be a great excuse to make someday happen.

“We just planned a wedding. We are done.”

I hear you. Find a fantastic all-inclusive resort. Tell everyone you're unavailable. Order something with an umbrella in it. We'll talk when you get back.

One destination or several?

This is another place where couples accidentally make themselves miserable. You've flown all the way to Europe. Surely you should see as much as possible! No.

You should see as much as you can enjoy. Those aren't the same thing. Every time you change destinations, you lose time. Packing. Checking out. Getting to the station. Waiting. Traveling. Finding the next hotel. Checking in. Unpacking. Realizing the charger is still plugged into the wall at the previous hotel.

Three cities in ten days can be wonderful. Six cities in ten days is cardio. For most honeymoons, I would rather see you choose fewer places and actually experience them. There will be another trip. In fact, that's rather the point of getting married.

Your budget gets a vote, too

This is where honeymoon planning becomes much easier once we're willing to stop pretending money isn't part of the conversation. A $6,000 honeymoon can be wonderful. A $15,000 honeymoon can be wonderful. They probably shouldn't be planned exactly the same way.

Instead of asking, “How much does a good honeymoon cost?”, ask - “What do we want our money to do for us?” 

Maybe you care deeply about the hotel and couldn't care less whether you fly economy. Maybe you'll happily stay somewhere simpler if it means taking a private boat along the coast. Maybe food is the thing. Maybe you want two weeks away more than you want five-star anything. Maybe the room with the ridiculous view is non-negotiable.

Good. Now we're getting somewhere. Luxury isn't a universal checklist. It's having the things that matter most to you handled exceptionally well. 

And please consider the season

There is one final character in this story who doesn't care about your Pinterest board. The calendar. 

The place that looks perfect may not be perfect during the month you're actually traveling. Weather matters. Crowds matter. Seasonal closures matter. Hurricane season matters. How early the sun sets matters. Whether the ferry you saved on Instagram is even running matters.

And pricing definitely matters. This doesn't mean you can't go somewhere during shoulder season or outside the supposedly “perfect” month. Sometimes that's exactly when you should go. It simply means we choose with our eyes open. 

Still can't decide? Good.

Seriously.

If you're torn between Italy and Costa Rica and an all-inclusive in Mexico, you haven't failed Honeymoon Planning 101. You've just reached the point where the interesting questions begin.

Maybe you love Italy because of the food. Costa Rica because you want adventure. And Mexico because you're completely exhausted. That's useful information. Because now we aren't really choosing between three destinations.

We're figuring out how much food, adventure and ease your honeymoon needs to have. That is something I can work with. At The Curated Mile, this is exactly why I don't begin by asking couples where they want to go.

Tell me how you like to spend a day. Tell me what you want to eat. Tell me what you never get enough time to do together. Tell me which one of you reads every museum plaque and which one has already found the café.

Tell me the budget. Tell me the ridiculous dream. Tell me what you're worried about. Tell me, “We have no idea. Please help.” That's allowed too. Then we figure out where in the world all of those pieces fit. 

Because your honeymoon doesn't need to look like anyone else's. It just needs to feel like the two of you.

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